A good heartbreak, to quote Alexander McCall Smith, “This is a city of shifting light, of changing skies, of sudden vistas. A city so beautiful it breaks the heart again and again.”
I've needed that beauty this week. Monday was pants, as they say here, beginning with my being late to workshop, finding out that my jump drive was BLANK, meaning I couldn't work on my Indesign projects AND that I had left my magazine write-up on my laptop at home.
Luckily, I was able to get a hold of P, who I'm staying with, and she emailed it to me.
And my bag broke. And... lots of things happened. Culminating in an email from the International Office wanting to meet with me about my funds. My friend, K, saw this as a good thing. I did not.
I was half right.
Which leads into Tuesday, when I woke up late, made it to my meeting and found out that my loans may come in sometime between now and November... maybe. Or sometime during November... they're not clear. At this point, I would just like to have a flat by Thanksgiving. And, since the Finance office people refuse to help us Americans out, with say a loan to cover expenses until they do their job, the Intl Office is offering me odd jobs, in return for a meal stipend.
I am, literally, working for food.
This then tipped off a day where I didn't get any coursework done, but I did spend the afternoon with friends... and it did not go well. Let's just leave it at that. Well, in one way it did go well. I... never mind. Moving on....
Side note: if you ever go to Fountain Park, DO NOT eat at "The Forth" the nachos were horrible and the chocolate banoffee (I love banoffee) was tasteless. I had to drink two cups of peppermint tea to recover.
Which led to today, when I woke up late and, therefore, missed this morning's lecture, because it takes me an hour to get to campus.
I really (to the 20th power) want my own flat.
The day was not helped by many factors, the impending projects coming soon were one of those factors. So, instead of staying on campus and working on a project (I did get one project done, I promise), I went shopping and got my haircut, which is step 1 in my plans. I was going to save this change for when I finally got my money, but I decided it couldn't wait, I needed it now. Stay tuned to Facebook for pictures.
My haircut is nice, a bit shorter than I planned, but still cute and I like it. This was helped by the great wash the Supercuts lady gave my hair. Oh, wonderful! If only the dang sinks weren't so uncomfortable on one's neck, it would have been perfect. When your right leg starts tingling, that is not a good sign.
So I spent way too much money on myself and I don't give a rat's behind. I feel better.
I also earned tons of points at Boots. (Boots is amazing. I freakin' love that store.)
Friday I'm going shoe shopping (it's getting desperate) and I saw the cutest pair of wellies yesterday. Yes, I do need them.
Being back in Edinburgh in this situation, I feel as though I'm dreaming. I am back in the city I know and adore, but people and aspects are different. The lack of housing is one. So I can't settle, because nothing feels permanent. And, truth be told, part of me fears I may have to leave.
I'm trying to be positive and grateful for everyday blessings. After all, I am in Edinburgh! So a part of me feels I'm home, but the rest is still unsettled, because everything else is inconstant.
This is not helped by the knowledge that I'm moving to new room sometime in the next two days (I hope, no word from the person I'm supposed to be staying with... joy).
Well, at least I have great friends, and kind people who let me sleep in their spare room and eat their food, and I'm in Edinburgh. Those last three words alone are keeping me sane and determined. And the sights of the city from the bus still make me smile and count myself lucky to be here again.
“When I looked out in the morning it is as if I had waked in Utopia.” George Elliot
The hell comes later. ha ha.
Ta, luvs.
Seriously, to those who read this blog, come see Edinburgh! You can stay with me, if I ever get a place. Edinburgh needs to be seen! By you. In person.
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